In the "Writing on Psychedelics" series, I delve into a singular subject while under the carefully administered influence of a medically-prescribed psychedelic substance. This is a controlled experiment and should not be replicated without proper medical supervision. Proceed with caution.
While going under, the psychedelic is starting to work on my mind. While I begin completely lucid, by the end of this section I am struggling to form coherent sentences as the psychedelic takes full effect.
During the coming up phase, I start writing as soon as I am able to sit and think clearly again, while still very much under the influence of the psychedelic. I write until I am either completely lucid or satisfied with the conclusion.
Only minor edits are made after the fact to maintain the integrity of the piece.
Going Under
"You leave me to doubt not only your judgement but your character."
These words pierce my soul. How, can I never hear them again. How do I not let my judgement or my character fall shy so much so that it betrays the other. I have spent so much time thinking about myself. Far too much time thinking about myself. About my capacity and my ability. About my judgement and my morality. Who am I? And why am I here? If I could find this answer, I would never need to fear these words again. If I get good enough at something, and that something is just, then I have nothing to fear. So what I do I do?